About Sacred Wind

Sometimes there are tales that must be told, songs that must be sung, and farts that must be farted. And sometimes the spirit of these great adventures, heroic deeds, songs of glory, and flatulent blessings is powerful enough to touch the hearts, ears and nostrils of the gods. And so it is with Sacred Wind.

Certainly, I know that I, King Beef Vindaloo-Boiled Rice III, puff my rice with pride and thicken my sauce when I recount the adventures of the Companionship of Wind. How a stranger from beyond distance and beyond time (a lad called Aiden Peersey, from your reality) joined Sacred Wind in their quest to win the Cestrian Music Tournament, to save the faerie queen, to win freedom for our land, to be able to fart freely, and to win the right to their cheese. It is the stuff of legend. And sometimes the gods decree that such legends need to be manifest in the entire Multiverse… although not necessarily the smells.

And so, in order for these tales to be read and for these songs to be heard, it was decreed that we should seek one in your reality who would be a suitable channel. The criteria were very strict: a spiritually-attuned individual with fire in his veins, passion in his heart, sharpness of mind, and steel in his underpants. Unfortunately, we couldn't find anyone who qualified, so we had to settle for Andy Coffey. And so it is he who has been the vehicle for our story and for the magnificent songs of Sacred Wind themselves. His wind will be forever blessed.

So, read and listen with pride, my friends. May your rice be forever fluffy, may your poppadoms be crisp, and may Odin bless your wind.

King Beef Vindaloo-Boiled Rice III.